I Don’t Want to Compete Anymore

I was at a country line dancing bar the other night with some friends (10/10 would recommend), and by the time line dancing ended and club music started, people started flooding in.

My first instinct was to see the cute, blonde headed girls walk in and think, “I hate them because they’re skinny, they’re blonde, they know how to apply makeup, and on and on…” But why? Why did I actually hate them?

The answer is: I didn’t. Right after I thought that, I wanted to take it back. I bet one of those girls is worried about dancing like a fool in front of a crowd. I bet another is worried that her hair fell flat. Another maybe is thinking about how much more she weighs than her friend group. Then one more might be too caught up about being underdressed compared to her friends.

It hit me. All of these girls were probably thinking the same think I had thought that same night. I worried about my hair, my lack of makeup, the color of my boots, the fact that I’m not cute and tiny like my friends, and one of my favorite quotes came to mind:

I’m not interested in competing with anyone. I hope we all make it.

And that was it. I wanted each girl to know how stinkin’ good she looked. How great she was getting down on the dance floor. How her hair fell over her shoulder like it would in a Pantene commercial. Why was I trying so hard to tear these girls down when I didn’t know them? I was wishing the worst for them, that they wouldn’t find the guy of their dreams or that they would spill a drink down their shirts. BUT WHY. Why can’t we all make it??

I am so tired of constantly comparing myself to other girls. I’m tired of comparing our weights, clothes, and Instagram profiles. And you know what? I’m even more tired of girls comparing themselves to me. I get, “your life is so together.” “You are so smart.” “Your house is always so clcompetingean, I could never do that.” WELL GIRL, I could never contour my face like you do yours so beautifully. I could never rock the heels you’re wearing. And I certainly never could wear a romper like you are slaying right now.

I think we’re all pretty damn great. I think God created each of us with a purpose to spread His love to others and I think that starts here. What if we started complimenting strangers when we see something great in them? What if we send that text of encouragement even if our envy is stinging?

I don’t want to compete with anyone. I want us all to make it in whatever our hearts dream. I want you to follow your dream and look good doing it! I want to support you in whatever way I can.

And I want to drop my friggin’ pride in the process.

Love you. Mean it.

xo, anna.jpg


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